Scott Pilgrim vs. the World is one of the wackiest movies out there. Based on a series of six comic books written and drawn by Bryan Lee O’Malley, the story follows the titular 20-something slacker (played by Michael Cera). He’s dating a high schooler, much to the chagrin of his bandmates.
When he meets the mysterious Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), Scott immediately falls for her, unaware that he will have to defeat her seven evil exes. Packed with a stellar cast and incredible action sequences, here are the 10 best one-liners from Scott Pilgrim vs. the World.
*SPOILERS AHEAD*
“Didn’t you get my email explaining the situation?”
Perhaps the greatest aspect of Scott Pilgrim is the absurd logic of its world. The story takes place in Toronto in a time before cell phones, which sets up Scott’s first ex-battle with Matthew Patel.
The pirate-looking ex-boyfriend responds sincerely to Scott’s confusion as to why he was demanding to battle at all, querying whether Scott had received his email. Once Scott admitted to having only “skimmed” the email, Patel screams in fury and begins the fight.
“He just left.”
Part of Scott’s character arc is the fact that he dates Knives Chau (Ellen Wong) while he’s dating Ramona. In the beginning phase of his relationship with Ramona, Knives comes to Scott’s apartment unannounced. His roommate Wallace (Kieran Culkin) answers the door and we see Scott run to the kitchen. As Knives inquires as to whether Scott is around, we see Scott dive headfirst out the window. “He just left.”
Wallace loves Knives and obviously feels bad covering up for Scott, whom we see reach back through the window to grab his quote. It’s excellently executed and a fantastic piece of physical comedy and line delivery by Culkin.
“Because I’m in lesbians with you. I really, really mean it.”
We don’t know why lesbians are always on Scott’s mind. As he explains to Wallace his deep affection for Ramona, the gay roommate hints that Scott might be in love. Wallace suggests, “Break out the L-word.” Scott thinks it’s ‘lesbian,’ and his second guess is ‘lesbians.’
Later, in a last-ditch effort to win back Ramona after a big fight, Scott finally opens up and tells Ramona that he’s in lesbians with her. It’s one of the funniest scenes in the film, especially when Scott realizes after she drives away the blunder he’s made.
“WE ARE SEX BOB OMB AND WE ARE HERE TO WATCH SCOTT PILGRIM KICK YOUR TEETH IN!”
Stephen Stills (Mark Webber), Kim Pine (Allison Pill), and Young Neil (Johnny Simmons) are Scott’s neglected bandmates, and after they sell out to the seventh evil ex for a big music contract, it seems like Scott’s friendships are all immediately dismantled.
But Scott apologizes to his bandmates. It comes as a surprise, then, that Kim screams the band’s countdown to set a beat for Scott as he initiates the final battle, one final act of solidarity for Sex Bob-omb’s former bassist.
“Bread makes you fat??”
After several dates, Ramona is finally coming over to Scott’s apartment for a date night. Things start off shaky, but improve as they sit down to eat Scott’s favorite dish: garlic bread. Scott admits he wishes he could eat it constantly and Ramona counters with basic nutritional knowledge, which he can hardly believe.
He exclaims through a mouthful, “bread makes you fat??” The sudden, anxious outburst and the quick cut to the next scene makes this quote the highlight of the entire date night sequence.
“He punched the highlights out of her hair!!!”
Ramona’s third evil ex, Todd Ingram (played by the talented Brandon Routh, who learned to play bass for the role) is a suave-looking vegan endowed with psychic mind powers. He’s also dating Scott’s ex, Envy (Brie Larson), who doesn’t like Knives at all.
She signals to Todd to shut her up and he hits Knives so forcefully that the blue highlights leave her hair. Young Neil helps her, wailing in disbelief of what happened. Although it’s a shocking moment, it establishes just how truly evil Todd is and makes his downfall even more satisfying.
“Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday.”
After he punches Scott through a wall, Todd’s grammar is smartly critiqued. It strikes a nerve and Todd tells Scott to “Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday. Because you’ll be dust on Monday. Because you’ll be pulverized in two seconds. And the cleaning lady … cleans up … dust. She dusts. And she has weekends off, so … Monday. Right?”
All the tension is deflated for a few seconds as everyone realizes that while Todd is a girl-hitting jerk, he’s also a moron incapable of any good retorts.
“This one’s for the guy in the balcony that keeps yelling at us. It’s called ‘We Hate You, Please Die.'”
Scott’s roommate Wallace is one of the funniest characters in the movie, completely detached from the crazy battles and faithful to tell Scott what he thinks he should do. He’s also notorious for stealing Scott’s sister’s boyfriends. While at the first round of Battle of the Bands at the Rock-it, Wallace is putting on a show of confidence for one of these boyfriends, heckling the first band Crash and the Boys.
The lead singer suddenly snaps, “This one’s for the guy in the balcony that keeps yelling at us. It’s called ‘We Hate You, Please Die.'” The scene happens early in the movie, while the zaniness of the story is still developing, and the whole exchange is thoroughly hilarious and unexpected.
“You made me swallow my gum — It’s going to be in my digestive tract for seven years!”
Gideon Graves (Jason Schwartzman) is Ramona’s seventh evil ex, obsessed with her affection, even to the point that he’d control her mind to obtain her love.
As Scott battles Gideon, he punches him in the throat. The entrepreneur and nightclub-mogul re-adjusts his glasses, bellowing at Scott, “It’s going to be in my digestive tract for seven years!” The line is delivered so well and the pettiness of Gideon’s anger fuels the intense scene.
“It’s milk and eggs, b%tch.”
Todd Ingram meets his end in a wildly memorable fashion. After Scott tricks the third evil ex to drink half and half, the walls of the club burst apart, and the Vegan Police stride in. Todd argues that he should have three strikes before being stripped of his mind powers, but the Vegan Police won’t hear it.
After feigning ignorance on his infractions, one of the police (Thomas Jane) snarls, “It’s milk and eggs, bitch.” They proceed to equip their de-vegan-ize rays and strip Todd of all his powers. A not-so-subtle jab at the vegan community, Thomas Jane plays the scene like Clint Eastwood. The line is delivered with withering disgust, making it, by far, the funniest one-liner in the movie.
NEXT: 20 Hidden Details Behind The Making Of Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World
