Schitt’s Creek: 10 Ted Puns That Were So Bad They’re Good

Schitt’s Creek: 10 Ted Puns That Were So Bad They’re Good

Schitt’s Creek star Sarah Levy (Twyla) recently announced on Instagram that she and her husband are expecting their first child. Fans of the series quickly congratulated her and her “bébé.” Thinking about the Schitt’s Creek family expanding has fans hoping for news on a possible spinoff or movie — especially after Annie Murphy (Alexis) commented in celebration.

Twyla didn’t have a serious relationship or baby in Schitt’s Creek, but Alexis was close. Her relationship with Ted was one of the best in the series. Ted soon became a beloved character who became well-known for his epic dad-like puns.

“It’s Always Gifts For The Dogs And Never For Me. It’s One Of My ‘Pet Peeves.'”

Schitt’s Creek: 10 Ted Puns That Were So Bad They’re Good

In season 4, Alexis Rose proved her maturity and growth by putting on a Singles Week in Schitt’s Creek as part of her new PR company. At this point in the series, Alexis and Ted were just friends so David dropped off a box of sweaters for the adoptable dogs.

As David dropped off the gifts for the dogs, Ted had an unbelievable pun, saying, “Okay, great, yeah. It’s always gifts for the dogs, and never for me. Definitely one of my ‘pet peeves.'” At this point, the Roses were used to Ted’s puns and stopped reacting to them.

“I Was Just Giving Them A Little ‘Pup’ Talk.

Ted gave his dogs a pup talk on Schitt's Creek

Another part of Alexis’ Singles Week was a pet adoption. In ‘The Rollout,’ Alexis stopped by Ted’s office and noticed him talking to adoptable dogs. At this point in Alexis and Ted’s relationship timeline, they were just friends with lingering feelings.

When Ted realized Alexis was standing behind him, listening to him coddle the dogs, he became embarrassed. He quickly said, “I was just giving them a little ‘pup talk,'” which fans loved.

“I’ve Had A Lot Of Fun Hanging Out With You, And I Really ‘Fal-Awful’ Saying This Over Text…”

Alexis and Ted sitting closely on a couch on Schitt's Creek

It’s an unpopular opinion to dislike Ted. His sweet demeanor was exactly what the Roses needed when they moved to Schitt’s Creek. Alexis, especially, learned a lot from Ted and became a kinder person because of it.

When the two got back together after taking a few years apart, they talked about the relationships they had in between. Alexis read one of the breakup text messages Ted sent to a woman named Melanie. Melanie worked at a falafel restaurant, which was why Ted felt comfortable dropping a falafel pun while breaking up with her. Melanie probably didn’t appreciate the pun, but fans did.

Alexis: “She Didn’t Wanna Bug You On A Weekend.” Ted: “‘Bug’ Me. I’m Sure…”

Ted combs lice out of Alexis' hair in his vet office

Although Stevie and David’s quotes proved themselves as one of Schitt’s Creek’s best friendships, Alexis and Ted were close behind. The reason why their relationship the second time around was so strong was because they took the time to get to know each other as friends.

Because they were so close, Alexis went to Ted’s office to borrow lice shampoo for dogs since she somehow caught lice at school and didn’t know where else to go. Alexis was embarrassed to tell Ted it was her who had lice so she said it was her friend that had it. Ted, of course, took this opportunity to use a “bug” pun, which Alexis didn’t find funny at the moment.

Alexis: “Oh, Is That A Sink?” Ted: “Oh, I ‘Sink’ It Is!”

Alexis and Ted work in Rose Apothecary for the day on Schitt's Creek

One of the funniest Schitt’s Creek episodes was when Alexis and Ted took care of Rose Apothecary for an afternoon. With David and Patrick busy, Alexis and Ted took care of the shop and waited for a package to come. But when the package was delayed, Alexis grew bored and roleplayed with Ted instead.

When they entered the bathroom to have a quickie before the delivery man showed up, Ted made a sink pun before slamming the door and placing Alexis on top of it. Funny enough, the sink broke and their little idea was ruined.

“Definitely Want To Get A Soak In Before You Tackle The Cones, Which You Must Be Really ‘Pining’ For By Now.”

Mutt and Tennessee standing outside the barn, ready to leave for their trip

In ‘Opening Night,’ Alexis and Ted stopped by Mutt’s barn because he asked Alexis to keep an eye on things while he and his girlfriend, Tennessee, were on a road trip.

Tennessee had no idea Mutt asked Alexis to keep an eye on the barn and it rubbed her the wrong way because they were exes. Ted tried to lighten the mood by making a pining pun referencing the couple collecting pine cones on their travels, but as always, it didn’t necessarily hit.

“And Don’t Worry, I’ll Be ‘Vetting’ Everyone In Advance.”

Ted talks to his dogs at the vet on Schitt's Creek

In yet another pun from ‘The Rollout,’ Ted told a group of puppies that he’d be vetting everyone before the event. This was, of course, a pun since he was a vet.

Alexis and Ted had a painful breakup on Schitt’s Creek but they were able to remain friends after taking some time apart. Alexis didn’t realize what a fantastic man Ted was until they became close friends and it always hit home for her when she heard him use his silly puns or do nice things for the community without being asked.

“If You’ve Ever Had Her Quiche, You Can Definitely Say That It Is ‘Eggs-Cellent.'”

Ted and his GF sitting outside on Schitt's Creek

A scene that lives rent-free in every fan’s head is the scene where David and Alexis unknowingly had lunch with Ted’s current girlfriend. Ted’s girlfriend owned a farm and made incredible cheeses and body products because of it.

David wanted her products exclusively in Rose Apothecary, hence the meeting. Alexis was incredibly awkward because she was secretly in love with Ted and didn’t know if she knew she was Ted’s ex. While eating lunch, David and Alexis raved about her quiche. Since quiches are made from eggs, Ted called them eggs-cellent.

“David, I Really Hope We Didn’t ‘Rope’ You Into Something Here.”

Ted and Alexis talking to Patrick during a ropes course on Schitts Creek

Although David was afraid of heights, he joined Alexis and Ted on a team bonding ropes course with Patrick’s help. Alexis and David weren’t the most outdoorsy of people so seeing their attempts at being athletic was hilarious.

Ted apologized to David for roping him into something he didn’t want to do, but the group wound up having a good time anyway.

“Tortoises, But I Do Have ‘Tur-Tell’ You What I’ve Been Thinking About You.”

Alexis and Moira talk about her new pet turtle on Schitt's Creek

In ‘The Job Interview,’ Alexis and Ted were doing long-distance when Ted was away on location for a short-term job.

During a Skype session, Ted told Alexis that he was bench-pressing a tortious since there was no gym on the island he was living on. Alexis said, “Ted! Stop making me jealous of turtles!” Realizing the chance to use a pun, Ted responded, “Tortoises, but I do have ‘tur-tell’ you that I’ve been thinking about you, a lot, especially at nighttime.” Her appreciation of his puns now that they were dating again made them one of Schitt’s Creek’s best couples.