The cast of characters in New Girl get up to a lot of shenanigans typical of sitcom dwellers. There are cases of mistaken identity, visits from exes that just won’t end, and holiday parties where everything goes wrong. The extreme situations, however, aren’t exactly the best to prepare them for competing in Squid Game.
Given that the New Girl characters do develop their own games to play in their apartment with complicated rules, playing the children’s games might not be where they would falter. Instead, it would be the high stakes and stress that come with them that would create problems for the friend group.
Robby
Robby would never find himself losing Squid Game because he couldn’t lose if he never played. He simply wouldn’t allow himself to be pulled into that situation.
This is partly because Robby never seems to have a shortage of money, and the pull to get players into the game is by preying on those who are in desperate need of funds. Robby might be intrigued at the idea of someone betting him a thousand dollars while he waited outside of a building, but he’d happily pay up if he lost and be on his way.
Schmidt
Despite his carefully cultivated persona, Schmidt is one of the most impulsive members of the loft, and someone who just cannot let things go. He would definitely be taken in by a man betting him on a simple game of flipping a card on the floor.
That being said, Schmidt would also properly flip out once he realized how deadly the games really were. It’s unlikely he would even make it past the “Red Light, Green Light” opening of the challenges because Schmidt would be so unnerved by his opponents being cut down in front of him.
Jess
Like Schmidt, Jess wouldn’t last long in Squid Game. She might make it through the first round, but the disturbing nature of what she got herself into would set in. She’d likely try to bond with her fellow game players, but her attempts at optimism probably wouldn’t be well received in their situation.
With her experiences as a teacher and with the games made up in the loft, Jess wouldn’t have a problem actually playing the games, but she wouldn’t be able to betray anyone, and she certainly couldn’t be responsible for sending anyone to their death.
Sam
Sam is a smart guy. He’s someone who can see when things are going on between Nick and Jess, even when they don’t. Sam is also a doctor, which means he’d likely be able to take care of his own injuries during Squid Game.
However, he isn’t great at playing the long game. He doesn’t let things go easily, and he’s not the best strategist. He would likely get so caught up in one of the rounds, like the glass version of hopscotch, that he’d end up making an enemy of some of the other players — or falling through the glass completely.
Nick
Some New Girl fans might expect to Nick be out at the start of the game, just like Schmidt. Nick is actually a lot smarter than people give him credit for, though. He did, after all, create a lot of the rules for True American, and he went to law school. Nick isn’t bad at understanding or playing games.
But if Nick bonded with any of the other players, it would mean his downfall as he wouldn’t be willing to betray them. He wouldn’t be able to run from his situation either, so he would be the one who ended up getting hurt.
Coach
Coach is very competitive. He would initially try to prove himself worthy of winning the game. But eventually, the stress of the situation would start to wear on him.
Coach could betray people he didn’t like over the course of the game, but when it got to the point that he was going up against teammates of his own choosing, the guilt would get to him. Like Nick, he wouldn’t be able to outrun his feelings, and he would be the one who ended up hurt.
Winston
The Winston of early in New Girl’s storylines wouldn’t last long. The Winston who trained to become a police officer, however, would. More observant than most, and definitely good at playing games, Winston would be keeping his head down and lasting as long as he could while gathering information about the games themselves.
But if Winston was noticed, he would become a target of the guards, not the other players, and he would find himself eliminated.
Aly
Aly is great at games. She has a whole storage unit full of the prizes she won on game shows to prove it. Her knack for figuring out new rules, and her competitive nature, means she would get pretty far in Squid Game.
Like Winston, she’d be putting all of those skills she honed as a police officer to use, being extra observant of her surroundings and her situation. That’s probably not where she would get caught, though. Aly likely wouldn’t be able to bring herself to kill an opponent, knowing that they’re an innocent person in a bad situation, and that would leave her vulnerable.
Reagan
As Reagan, Megan Fox is great on New Girl. She shakes up the dynamic and brings a new perspective to the show. Reagan is able to compartmentalize her emotions and her goals, which would be very helpful in a situation like Squid Game. As long as she was able to follow the rules of the different rounds, she would make it nearly to the end.
The real question would be whether she would be capable of physically defeating her final opponent or not. If she was physically stronger and able to hold out long enough in the final round, the game would be hers. Only one other person could beat her.
Cece
Cece shows numerous times in the series just how tough she is. She talks about vacationing with criminals at one point, and she is more than willing to get in physical altercations on behalf of her friends.
But more than that, Cece is the best liar out of her friends. She’s able to present to the world the face she wants them to see, which would serve her well while she’s assessing her opponents in Squid Game. Cece would spend the first few rounds of the games blending in before she really got to work and made herself a real competitor, and then, she would win it all.
