How To Have Sex Review: Compelling Coming-Of-Age Drama Tackles Consent With Nuance

Coming-of-age movies can be the most honest and deep when it comes to exploring people in their growth and experiences. How to Have Sex, written and directed by Molly Manning Walker, is a nuanced, searing portrait of consent, and how one’s discomfort can easily be overlooked, even by friends. There’s pressure to have sex as a teenager, a rite of passage before graduation and moving into young adulthood. How to Have Sex is gentle in its handling of a sensitive subject, and expertly navigates its main character’s interiority throughout.

Three teenage friends head out for a final holiday trip as they prepare to leave high school and enter college, all expecting to let their inhibitions go and enjoy a summer filled with partying and casual sexual encounters. One of the girls, Tara, is still a virgin and experiences the pressures of sexuality when compared to her friends.

Pros

• How to Have Sex expertly handles sensitive issues
• Mia McKenna-Bruce’s performance is exemplary
• Molly Manning Walker crafts a deeply layered story
• How to Have sex is compelling while exploring discomfort

How To Have Sex Masterfully Explores Pressure & Consent

How to Have Sex begins with Tara (Mia McKenna-Bruce) and her friends, Skye (Lara Peake) and Em (Enva Lewis), are excited for a holiday away in Malia. They’re ready to party, party, party the days away. Tara is also hoping to have sex for the first time, and she’s encouraged by her friends to do so, but there’s also a lot of pressure to do it; Tara is under the impression that a party vacation is the perfect time, and everyone and everything around her reaffirms this thinking.

Having sex is also something Tara can focus on besides waiting for the results of the exams that will determine her university future, which she is nervous about. The holiday is meant to be fun, but Walker expertly delves into Tara’s experiences — the good and the bad, painting a picture of what one’s surroundings and dubiousness surrounding sexual assault can lead to. Much of Tara’s journey is internal, but the writer-director masterfully conveys the discontent and inner struggle that underscores Tara’s experience, especially after her night with Paddy (Samuel Bottomley).

The film authentically portrays the shame and guilt one can feel when discussing assault and the lack of consent. Tara becomes closed off, and while Em picks up on some of her distress, Skye is only interested in the details of the night, believing Tara’s experience to be a positive one simply because Paddy is fit. To that end, How to Have Sex showcases the difficulties of talking about sex under such circumstances, and Tara spends much of the movie turning inward, while verbally convincing others that her sexual experience was fine when she’s clearly torn up about it.

Tara’s responses are unconvincing for anyone paying attention, and her body language is closed off in the aftermath, but if Badger (Shaun Thomas), Paddy’s friend and someone Tara seemed to genuinely like, noticed anything was wrong, he didn’t comment about it — at least, not beyond suggesting Paddy can be a jerk. Perhaps, in his own way, Badger is trying to make Tara feel better while excusing his friend, and it’s in this instance, as well as Skye’s consistent comments about Tara being lucky, that How to Have Sex is at its most nuanced.

Mia McKenna-Bruce’s Performance Is Powerful & Layered

The viewing experience is elevated by McKenna-Bruce’s performance. As Tara, she conveys a vibrant energy before reeling it in for a quieter, detached portrayal in the second half of the film. We know how she’s feeling at any given point thanks to the actress’ ability to express the depth of Tara’s emotions. Her body language is hesitant and, later, nearly closed off entirely. You’ll want to hug her and tell her everything will be okay while being heartbroken that something so awful happened to her. McKenna-Bruce imbues Tara with a sense of discomfort that extends beyond the screen.

Manning’s film isn’t all talk and platitudes. It truly sees beyond the veil as it studies the characters, Tara’s feelings and Paddy’s actions. How to Have Sex is also uninterested in a happy ending. It’s honest and willing to go to uncomfortable places without ever feeling exploitative. It’s a raw and real portrayal of how sexual assault can happen and the mental and emotional turmoil that comes after.

That isn’t to say that How to Have Sex doesn’t also have some light and fun moments. Watching Tara and her friends let loose and have a good time partying underscores their youth and desire to forget what they’re not ready to confront. These scenes have great energy, and the group Tara strikes up a brief friendship with reveal the kindness of strangers, and this works as a contrast to Tara’s relationship with Skye. These moments add to the film, which is a deeply compelling, dynamic must-watch.