The beloved sitcom Brooklyn Nine-Nine might not be the greatest show to turn to when you’re in need of relationship advice, but it will provide a few laughs on the subject. Throughout the series 7 seasons fans have watched as the members of the Brooklyn precinct have gone through the ups and downs of love and relationships.
Fans cheered for Boyle as he pined after Rosa and they also squealed with excitement when Jake and Amy finally said “I do”. Through it all Brooklyn Nine-Nine has given fans many warm fuzzy feelings even if the feeling is later ruined by someone’s sarcastic remark as it is Brooklyn Nine-Nine after all. Here are the 10 funniest Brooklyn Nine-Nine quotes about love:
“I love how much you pretend to like Die Hard.” – Jake
Every couple knows that at some point in the course of the relationship, you will have to make a sacrifice for your partner whether it’s going to a party you wish you didn’t have to attend or watching a movie you could care less about such as Die Hard.
Jake is a huge fan of Die Hard, often referencing it throughout Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s 7 seasons. When Amy and Jake begin their relationship in season 3, Amy knows there will be challenges to overcome in their relationship and compromises will need to be. One compromise Amy made was agreeing to watch Die Hard and pretending to care about it. That’s true love right there.
“Breakups are the cartoony thumbs down. They make people feel face-with-Xs-for-the-eyes.” – Gina
Gina is quite clearly the poetic and articulate one of the precinct as she has a real way with words and capturing the heart of the moment. Gina might not seem like the most emotional person, but she really understands heartbreak.
In season 1, episode 22 “Charges and Specs”, Gina bestows fans with her powerful gift with emotions and words. When Vivian breaks up Charles right before their wedding, Gina attempts to shed some light on what Charles is feeling as he deals with his heartbreak.
“I would marry you on the G Train in the summertime when the air conditioning is broken.” – Jake
Jake and Amy showed fans what it means to go to the ends of the earth to be with the person you love. Even when their wedding plans went awry, the two didn’t let anything get in the way of them sharing their vows.
When Amy questions whether they should get married at city hall as it’s the same place where people get restraining orders, Jake reminds her that the place doesn’t matter. He would marry her in the Gowanus Canal and on the Empire State Building during a King Kong attack.
“Except now the Ebony Falcon is monogamous and too tired for sex so his only indulgence is fresh-fruit yogurt parfaits.” – Sergeant Jeffords
Becoming committed and monogamous will definitely change the way you live your life. No more one-night stands or meaningless encounters, or much intimacy at all when you have a full time job and kids to raise. Even the Ebony Falcon has to settle down at some point.
Sergeant Jeffords might have been a promiscuous playboy back in his day, but not anymore as he drives a minivan and his only indulgences is fresh fruit yogurt parfaits. Sarge has become so straight-laced, that he doesn’t even eat cake for his indulgence.
“A walk in the park, how romantic. And I know where are all the murder spots are.” – Jake
There are many pros to dating a cop such as feeling safe and knowing where all the murder spots are in the park. Jake Peralta proves to be one of the most romantic boyfriends in season 2, episode 14 “Defense Rests”.
When Sophia is unable to hangout with Jake that evening, the couple decide to spend the few minutes they have free together by taking a lovely stroll in the park. Jake informs Sophia that he knows where all the murder spots are and also tells her she can choose whether to avoid them or see them. What a gentleman.
“If you break up with them, you can always send them to jail.” – Amy
While there may be many perks to dating a cop such as knowing where the murder spots are in the park, there are also cons such as they can put you in jail if they choose to break up with you. This is why it might be a bit of a challenge for cops to date other cops.
In season 2, episode 21 “Det. Dave Majors” Amy tells Jake that she has a new rule for her love life which is she will no longer be dating cops. Jake agrees with this rule and informs her he will also no longer be dating cops and will only be romantically involved with criminals from now on. Not a bad plan since when you decide to break up with them, you can just take them to jail.
“Will you go on the worst date ever with me? You have to say yes.” – Jake
Fans rejoiced when Santiago and Peralta finally tied the knot in the fifth season of Brooklyn Nine-Nine. It was a long road, as their budding romance started with a bet way back in season 1. For thirteen episodes fans watched as the two detectives rivaled over who could get more felony arrests.
In episode 13, the winner of the bet was finally awarded. On the last day, during the last minute Jake makes ten felony arrests, crowning him as the winner. This meant Amy had to suffer her punishment of going on a date with Jake.
“And it has been a pleasure to watch your distracting childish rivalry evolve into a distracting childish courtship and now into what I’m sure will be a distracting childish marriage.” – Captain Holt
Captain Holt is a serious, professional man, but he does have a soft spot for love. He was an often annoyed bystander during Jake and Amy’s relationship, and almost no one knew the couple better than him. When the two tied the knot in season 5, it only seemed right to have Captain Holt as their officiator
Amy and Jake’s wedding might not have gone according to plan, but it was a beautiful event as there was not a dry eye in the house when Captain Holt spoke his piece and told them both that he loved them and was proud of them.
‘This is happening. Jake and Amy are getting married tonight. Title of my sex tape!” – Charles
Charles is one of the bests friends anyone could ask for as he always has his friends’s backs, is honest, and caring. However he’s not always the smoothest guy as he is often making others feel a little awkward even his best friend Jake.
No one was more excited about Jake and Amy getting married than Charles. Even Jake and Amy weren’t as excited as Charles. Not only did he faint when he found out they were engaged, but he also announced his excitement by titling his sex tape “Jake and Amy are getting married tonight!”
“Forget your ex with meaningless sex. It rhymes because it’s true.” – Gina
Many fans were happy for Jake and Amy who found lasting love, but not everyone in life is so lucky in love. And that’s where Gina comes in. She never fails at offering words of wisdom and advice for those suffering from heartbreak.
In season 1, episode 22 “Charges and Specs” Gina attempts to come up with a solution to aid Charles during his heartbreak after Vivian dumps him. Rosa struggles to cheer up Charles, so Gina informs her there is in fact a way to end his woes which is, “Forget your ex with meaningless sex.” And since it rhymes, it obviously means it’s true.
