This article contains spoilers for Succession season 4.Aside from being one of the most popular series on television in the last few years, Succession is best known for its dialogue, which is so intense and witty that the past four seasons of the series offer a seemingly endless array of memorable quotes. First released in 2018, Succession is a dark comedy and drama series following a family of billionaires, all vying for control of the family media conglomerate as its aging patriarch moves closer to retirement. After four seasons, the series has made waves for its unique characters, intense twists, and hilariously creative one-liners.
With an ensemble of amazing actors from Brian Cox to Nicholas Braun, it’s been easy for Succession to rack up an impressive series of iconic quotes and moments. Characters like Cousin Greg and Roman bring a distinct sense of humor to the series that led to some of the strangest and funniest lines on television. But on the other hand, characters like Kendall and Logan offer moments of tension and severity that remain with viewers long after the show has ended. In this way, Succession gives audiences a perfect mix of comedy and drama, all of which can be summed up with 50 of the best Succession quotes to date.
50 “You Know Waystar Royco? We Do Hate Speech And Rollercoasters.”
Roman
For those who have never seen Succession and need a summary of the Roy family and its media company, this is the perfect quote. In season 2, Shiv has been promised the top spot at Waystar Royco, but her claim to the throne isn’t going as smoothly as she hoped as she is pushed out of important proceedings. Teasing her, Roman asks if she knows anything about the company she’s meant to inherit and says the following quote. Not only is this a solid prod from Roman, but it also encapsulates the problematic priorities of Waystar Royco and the legacy Logan has built.
49 “Maybe I Don’t Want To Donate My Body To Political Science.”
Willa
Although Succession is full of bloodthirsty businesspeople, not every character in the series has the same ambition. For example, Connor’s partner Willa is pulled headfirst into the Roy family drama due to her relationship with the eldest Roy and often has to sacrifice her own desires for the good of the family. In season 3, during the Future Freedom Summit, Willa struggles with keeping a brave face and says this to Connor as various political figures make advances on her.
48 “What The F–k Is This, McCarthyism? I’m Not Declining, I’m Just Not ‘Clining'”
Shiv
The only daughter of Logan Roy, Shiv is highly opinionated and ruthless when necessary, especially when it comes to important decisions. In the very first season of Succession, Logan rewrites his will so that his wife Marcia will have two votes on the board of Waystar Royco, and although this is her father’s wish, Shiv doesn’t appreciate the change. When Roman tries to convince her to agree to the terms, she fights it, claiming to be “clining” to buy herself some time to reconfigure the situation.
47 “I Assure You I Am Spiritually And Emotionally And Ethically And Morally In Favor Of Whoever Wins.”
Stewie
While some characters like Logan hold all the power in Succession, others must make difficult choices to stay on the right side of things. Of course, sometimes all that needs to happen though is a character supporting whoever wins, which is what Stewie does in this quote. Stewie is a friend of Kendall’s and a member of the Waystar Royco board, and while sometimes he has power to tip the scales at the company, he usually sticks to whoever will make the most money. In this way, he fits perfectly into the greedy hierarchy of Waystar.
46 “America, Be Afraid. Be Warned. For The Conheads Are Coming.”
Connor
Of the four Roy siblings, Connor is the one who takes the most unusual path throughout the show. Rather than trying to become his father’s successor, he begins a campaign to become the next president. One particularly hilarious part of this storyline is that, as confident as he is, Connor isn’t a very popular candidate, only garnering 1% of votes in the election. However, he still graces his few followers with a name: the Conheads. This nickname is a great one-liner from Connor and also represents those real-life Succession viewers who root for Connor throughout the show.
45 “Nice Vest Wambsgans. It’s So Puffy. What Is It Filled With, Your Hopes and Dreams?”
Roman
Roman Roy’s number one quality as a character is his ability to insult anyone in a creative and biting way. This quote, for example, targets Tom Wambsgans, Shiv’s husband. Rather than using a basic insult or directly criticizing Tom’s personality, Roman targets Tom’s clothing and even seems nonchalant doing it. In this way, Roman creates the perfect barb because of its attention to detail and off-handed delivery.
44 “I’m Better Than You. You’re, You Know, I Hate To Say This Because I Love You, But You’re Kind Of Evil.”
Kendall
One of the most dangerous dynamics to appear on Succession is the relationship between Logan and Kendall. After Logan snatches the company away from Kendall in the very first episode of the series, their connection worsens until it becomes all-out hatred. Because of this, Kendall has no problem telling his father how he really feels about him. This quote is a great summation of Kendall’s and his sibling’s feelings towards Logan because it shows how they love him because he’s family but also their awareness of his cruel ways.
43 “Here’s The Thing About Being Rich: It’s F–cking Great. It’s Like Being A Superhero, Only Better.”
Tom
While Succession’s best characters may struggle with family problems and their own goals, at the end of the day, they are all incredibly rich and have nothing material to lose. This is perfectly characterized by the above quote from Tom to Greg, who is a newcomer to the Roy family drama. Tom in particular is a character who works hard to maintain his status and money and so this quote is especially fitting for him and reflects well at the end of the series when he becomes Waystar’s CEO.
42 “Well At Least I’m Only Being Fucked By One Member Of This Family”
Willa
Although Willa makes various sacrifices throughout the show to be with Connor, she isn’t entirely powerless to the people around her. In Succession season 1 during Thanksgiving dinner, she has an interaction with Tom wherein she offers this jab, referencing how Tom is the entire family’s punching bag whereas her only problem is Connor. This line shows that Willa is much more self-aware than she may seem and isn’t afraid to defend herself against the Roys when need be.
41 “Look, Full Disclosure, I Am Currently Having A Panic Attack.”
Karl
This quote isn’t just hilarious because of how casually Karl says it, but also because of the memorable moment in which it takes place in Succession season 2. In the episode “DC,” Roman, Karl, and Jamie go to Turkey to negotiate a deal and almost immediately get pulled into a hostage situation. In true Succession style, Karl says the following quote with only a small amount of distress as they try to navigate the deal and how to get out of there alive. This is definitely a shining moment for the usually cocky Karl and a memorable line throughout the series.
40 “What I Think He Meant To Say Was That He Wished That Mom Gave Birth To A Can Opener, Because At Least Then It Would Be Useful.”
Roman
Yet another best Succession Roman quote, this one is aimed at Kendall and pulls on his fraught relationship with Logan. Once again, this is a perfect insult because of its witty wording and focus on the other character’s weak spots. Although Kendall doesn’t get along with Logan, he still cares about what his father thinks of him, and so this line is particularly well-aimed. Plus, it creates such a strange image that it definitely stands out among other Succession dialogue.
39 “I Thought That Would’ve Kinda Been Your Dream, Rome. Me F—ing Gerri With Your D–k.”
Shiv
Roman isn’t the only Roy sibling who can hit others where it hurts. When Roman accidentally sends an inappropriate photo to Logan rather than Gerri, Shiv uses the scandal to try and push him out of the running to become CEO. Even worse, when Roman confronts Shiv about her shady plan, she says this, using his unconventional crush on Gerri against him. Additionally, the insult not only points out Roman’s feelings but also his aversion to sex, hitting him in two very weak spots. For once, Roman gets the same type of burn he’s always dealing out.
38 “What Am I Going To Do With A Soul Anyways?”
Greg
As the estranged cousin and newcomer to the Roy family, Greg begins Succession as innocent and clueless, making him immediately likable against his more corrupt family members. However, over time Greg begins to learn the ways of Waystar Royco and leans into the cutthroat world of business. During the Succession season 3 finale, when Greg is brought into Tom’s plan to betray Shiv and stick with Logan, Greg says the above quote, both nervous and excited about the prospect. This line definitely shows Greg’s major pivot from lost puppy to rising star at Waystar.
37 “I’m Not Saying I’d Make A Better CEO. That’s Unsaid.”
Connor
One of Connor’s best qualities throughout Succession is his absurdly high self-confidence. Although he is often knocked down by his siblings or given less attention by Logan, he always bounces back again, fully confident that he can do anything. One particular job he claims he could do is being the CEO of Waystar, despite being the only sibling who doesn’t work for the company. In this case, the best part of the line is how self-assured Connor is, even going so far as to imply that everyone thinks he could be the CEO but just doesn’t say so.
36 “Romulus. When You’re Laughing, Please Do It At The Same Volume As Everyone Else. We Didn’t Get You From A Hyena Farm.”
Logan
While most of Logan’s best Succession quotes revolve around yelling and blatantly insulting everyone around him, at times Logan can be funny in his abuses, reflecting Roman’s own talent for creative insults. In this case, the jab in question is directed at his third son, calling out his loud, hyena-like laugh. Although the insult is particularly unique, another great aspect of this line is Logan’s use of Roman’s full name. It reflects a vulnerability between the characters and gives audiences a peek into the Roys childhood, which is always enjoyable.
35 “The Logan Roy School Of Journalism? What’s Next, The Jack The Ripper Women’s Health Clinic?”
Ewan
Logan’s liberal brother Ewan appeared humorously serious every time he appeared on Succession, but that didn’t mean that he couldn’t have some memorable dialogue. For example, he mocks his brother with the above quote, comparing his corrupt dealings at Waystar Royco with the murders of Jack the Ripper. Ewan’s hatred of Logan’s work is definitely stronger than most characters on the series, but in a sense, he brings a sense of clarity with lines such as these. Although Logan is mighty, he also has a dangerous impact on the world that goes beyond just movies and TV.
34 “You Wanna Play Bitey?”
Shiv
One of the most iconic and surprising moments from Succession season 4 was when Shiv spoke this line to Tom at a party. Recently separated, Tom and Shiv struggle to be around each other during the season, and typically, end up in a yelling match. However, in this scene, Shiv offers an olive branch by recruiting Tom to play “bitey,” a game where both people bite each other until someone gives up. It’s a violent game yet a playful side to Shiv that isn’t shown often. For this reason, it’s an iconic quote and moment within Succession history.
33 “Don’t Threaten Me Gerri, I Don’t Have Time To Masturbate.”
Roman
A surprising relationship that appeared throughout Succession was the sexual connection between Roman and Gerri. Although the age difference and work setting provides a strange setting, there is still an undeniable spark between the two that confuses them and audiences alike. However, it also offers some hilarious moments as well, as Roman is often easily persuaded by Gerri and her dominant ways. In just a brief line, Roman summarizes how much of an effect Gerri has on him.
32 “I Love You And I’m Glad You’re A Part Of My Life, But I Am Taking Legal Action Against You.”
Greg
The best Greg quotes in Succession are the ones that are delivered in a nervous, bumbling way. For example, in season 2 Greg asks Tom how to tell his grandfather, Ewan, that he’s going to sue him after Ewan removes Greg from his will. The above quote is what Greg wants to get across without quite saying those exact words, however, those words are hilarious, especially in the earnest way he says them. At that moment, it’s clear that Greg is learning how to be bloodthirsty, but still lacks the confidence to make those moves.
31 “You Don’t Hear Much About Syphilis These Days. Very Much The MySpace Of STDs.”
Tom
If Tom is good at anything, it’s making weirdly astute observations. In Succession season 2, the Roys attend a conference in Argestes among other important media figures. While there, they see Stewie and Sandy, the latter of which is beginning to look unwell from his syphilis diagnosis. In response to seeing him, Tom says the above, comparing the STD to a long-dead social media website. The joke is so strange that it’s funny and also doesn’t make a bad point either.
