In the history of sitcoms, rarely have there been men like Ron Swanson of Parks and Recreation and Jack Donaghy of 30 Rock. In their own ways, they are leaders of men and women, fountains of advice who guide those around them. Given Ron’s contempt for government he would probably be quite supportive of Jack’s pure capitalist ideals, though they might have different ideas on how to spend a Friday evening. While the two men are likely to be friends, their advice might not be on equal footing.
JACK: Dress To Impress
From his secret stash of ties to his closet of suits behind a hidden wall, Jack Donaghy is always ready to make an memorable first impression with his look. He’s not a farmer so he knows you need to wear a tuxedo after six in the evening. He gets his hair cut every two days because he knows your hair is your head’s suit. These are the types of lessons about style that Jack Donaghy teaches his mentees. Donaghy knows that those first impressions are the only ones that truly matter in business.
RON: No One Else’s Opinion Matters
Ron Swanson has a different approach to these kind of situations, namely what anyone else thinks of you doesn’t matter as most people are stupid. His average clothes budget over a five year period is approximately $40.
Ron wears what he deems appropriate for the situation, something guided by how much respect he has for whatever he’s doing. If it’s his job at City Hall, you can guarantee that he has zero respect for it. The only hard and fast rule is that he dresses like Tiger Woods the day after he gets lucky.
JACK: Master Of Corporate America
For the vast majority of his life, Jack’s main goal was to be in charge of General Electric. That journey led him to NBC and 30 Rock where he was waylaid by Liz Lemon and the TGS crew for a long time. The experience changed him in many ways, so much so that his goals needed to be updated. This was in no small part due to his daughter which changed his priorities. Still, Jack became a master of manipulating and dominating the world of corporate America. Most of his advice is directed towards that goal.
RON: Be A Man And Make It Yourself
Much like Jack, Ron’s outlook on life changed dramatically when he became a father. Marrying a sane person helped, too. But what didn’t change is that Ron believes buying things is stupid. Just make it yourself.
While Jack knows that America is ready to make, he’s not really a hands on type of guy in this regard. Ron, on the other hand, is the guy who is going to make a canoe at a moment’s notice and then disappear into Pawnee National Park. He’s a firm advocate of self sufficiency in all areas.
JACK: Being A Mentor
Part of Jack’s methodology is having someone to mentor in the same way Don Geiss did for him before dying and returning as a peacock. Unfortunately for Jack, he chose Liz Lemon. She fit all his criteria but she’s still Lemon and she tends to Lemon the ever loving crap out of everything. It’s not that she isn’t capable but she’s good just the way she is. Still, that hasn’t stopped Jack from trying to mentor others like Frank, which ended poorly. Jack is driven to pass on his accumulated wisdom, even when it’s not a great idea.
RON: Avoiding Being A Mentor
With every fiber of his being, Ron actively fights trying to mentor anyone. Chris Traeger tried on more than one occasion to receive guidance from him, which Ron begrudgingly did in his own way. Swanson does help his friends, or workplace proximity associates as he likes to call them. But taking such an active role in someone else’s life would drive him nuts.
The only people he has ever shown that much interest in guiding were April and Andy. Regardless of his attempts to the contrary, Ron has consistently, often accidentally, gives everyone around him amazing advice.
JACK: Secret Cookie Jar Collection
When it comes to living his life in the limelight, Jack knows how to handle himself. He’s accustomed getting attention from his peers and the press. But he’s also a man with secrets, some more important that others. Jack has has romances that he’s kept from public attention to protect them. But his greatest was something far more insidious: a secret cookie jar collection. One of the main lessons Jack could teach anyone is how to balance various aspects of their life while working towards success, and hiding those things that belong only to you.
RON: Duke Silver
Ron has no interest in anyone knowing anything about him ever. Quite literally, he prefers to keep approximately 95% of his life a secret from everyone. No one knows where his house is for sure. He keeps his reputedly large fortune of gold hidden all over Pawnee. Then, there’s Duke Silver.
Swanson performed jazz saxophone for years in secret under the name Duke Silver, only revealing it when absolutely necessary. Except for April who worked it out her own, his work proximity associates had no idea. Ron is a living lesson in the value of privacy.
JACK: Jack Attack: The Art Of Aggression In Business
Jack Donaghy summarized his business acumen and wisdom in a book titled, Jack Attack: The Art of Aggression in Business. Reading that book would give you valuable insight into corporate America as well as an edge in all negotiations. Proteges of Jack Donaghy like Floyd DeBarber treat this book like a bible. It received praise from such luminaries as Bill Gates, Sir Richard Branson and Don Geiss. If you ever need a hit of Donaghy wisdom and the man himself isn’t around, this book is a must have.
RON: The Swanson Pyramid Of Greatness
It turns boys into men, men into gladiators and gladiators into Swansons. Ron’s carefully devised Pyramid of Greatness is made up of 45 entries spread across nine tiers. It covers acceptable hairstyles, proteins and masonry. He’s also so against skim milk that it appears on the Pyramid twice. Everything you need to succeed in life is part of this system. Ron wouldn’t care about being part of any competition related to advice at all but the Pyramid is a game winning move when it comes to the advice question.
